This is a game the two of you are playing …

Comment on Why Is My Ex Ignoring My Phone Calls? by Love Doctor Yangki Akiteng.

This is a game the two of you are playing and it’s not just her but you too. She pulls away, you use no contact to trigger whatever fears she has of being rejected/abandoned/not paid attention to etc. She comes back because it somehow helps her to feel she’s still wanted but pulls away again.

At this point (this why I completely discourage no contact, it severely limits your options) there are only two things you can do 1) be patient and let her contact you or 2) contact her. Whatever you decide to do, this game the two of you are playing is destructive to the relationship (if there is still any). One of you has to step up and be the adult, if not, it’s going to be like this until one walks away — for good!

Love Doctor Yangki Akiteng Also Commented

Why Is My Ex Ignoring My Phone Calls?
I don’t think people “forget” someone they’ve been with that easily. But it’s possible he has made up his mind and wants nothing to do with you. After all, you did tell him he is right, the breakup is best for both of you.

To be honest, I’m quite surprised that you even expected a response… you disappeared for 3 months then reappeared only to tell someone “you are right, the breakup is best for both of us”. What did you expect him to say/do???


Why Is My Ex Ignoring My Phone Calls?
You can hide your feelings or ignore her texts, it’s not going to make her want to take you back if these three questions are not adequately addressed.

1) Why did you break-up?

2) What have you done (change/personal work) to make sure things will be different/better?

3) What are you doing to show your ex you are a better partner than the person she broke up with?


Why Is My Ex Ignoring My Phone Calls?
It hurts to now be able to see more clearly in hind sight, but at least you can learn from that and try to do better next time.

I don’t know if she’s moved on or not. It’s only been 2 days, who knows she may respond in the next few days. You haven’t had any contact for 5 weeks, so it’s not like she’s been waiting for you to contact her. Remember she did say she wanted to remain in contact but you made the choice not to. She could be wondering why you are contacting her now. Wait a few more days, even a week and see what happens. If she doesn’t respond, contact her a couple more times and if she still doesn’t respond, you got your answer.


Recent Comments by Love Doctor Yangki Akiteng

Communicating Vs. Emotional Connection (Pt 2)
I’m hoping with you… 🙂
Thank you for your kinds words.


Laid Back Vs. Detached – And How Not to Be Needy
In the context of attracting back your ex, yes.

Go to “All Articles” in the menu and select “Attachment Anxiety & Avoidant Ex” category or type “attachment anxiety” in the search tool and read the articles that come up.


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I know… 😉


Signs Your Ex Is Moving On (Has Moved On)
Type “emotional connection” in the search tool and there are several articles on how to emotionally connect with an ex. My book ‘Dating Your Ex” also has examples of how to go about making an emotional connection. But if you want more specific advice tailored to your unique situation, your ex’s personality and your ex’s attachment style, I am happy to coach you on how to emotionally connect with him and move things forward.


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Spend time on this site and you’ll learn how. Balancing closeness and respect for the other’s boundaries is exactly what the site is about.


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