If you don’t know anything about attachment styles, you are left wondering, “What do I have to do to get a reaction out of my ex… any reaction positive or negative, I don’t care. Anything is better than total silence”.
If you know about attachment styles, you know you are dealing with a dismissive avoidant. Not angry about the break-up and not devastated about it either (at least on the outside). Just calm, cold and distant.
It’s frustrating to love a dismissive avoidant because they don’t seem as invested in the relationship. You end up doing most of the work, reaching out, asking them how they were, arranging dates, pointing out the issues in the relationship and trying to make the relationship work.