Question: What are the signs the universe wants you to be with your ex? He left 11 days ago, too many old patterns and negative energies being brought in. I’ve stayed in contact meanwhile clearing energy from myself. I have also been working on my heart chakra; actually released something that was old and getting in my way. I sent him a message to tell him about it. He texted back “I am actually on a street with your last name” with a smiley face. For months I have had a strong gut feeling that my ex will come back to me. This to me is a sign from the universe. Do you that sometimes the Universe or God wants you to be in a relationship with your ex?
Yangki’s Answer: Yes I do. I believe that God can restore a relationship with my ex. I also believe that if your gut is telling you that the universe wants you to be with your ex; you should trust your gut feeling and not ignore it.
But not everything that happens is a “sign God or the universe” wants you to be with your ex. Sometimes when you want something so bad… you’ll see all kinds of signs God or the universe wants you to be with your ex. But you will also miss so many other signs from the universe also!
It is easier for me to say, “Yep. Definitely. The universe is sending you signs that you will get back together” and you’d go your happy way. Job well done Coach!
But since I am a relationship coach and not a psychic or “spiritual adviser”, I see things in a more practical way.
- I have worked with many clients who like you had a strong gut feeling that their ex will come back, and their ex came back.
- I have also worked with many clients who had a strong gut feeling that their ex will come back, and their ex didn’t come back.
- Then were clients who had a strong gut feeling their ex had moved on, and I, on the other hand felt strongly and with my experience knew that their ex had not moved. The client was a fearful avoidant who was just afraid things might not work out and had convinced themselves they needed to move on to avoid disappointment.
The point is, we mostly see what we want to see in life in general and also in our relationships.
If you want proof that your ex still loves you, you will see even an angry ‘eff you’ text as a sign that your ex still loves you because he still has “feelings” for you, and is still “responding” to your texts. It doesn’t matter that your ex is telling you to eff off and even threatening to call the police on you, you see “love” because you want to see love.
The reverse is also true. If you want proof that your ex does not love you or will not come back, you will find it.
- Your ex reads your text and doesn’t reply. You read it as they don’t want you to contact them anymore.
- Your ex says “goodnight” but didn’t sign off with xoxo. You read they don’t love you any more
- Your ex stops using the pet name they call you. You read, they don’t want you back.
- Your ex posts a “happy” picture of him or herself on Facebook. It must be a message to you that they moved on and are happy without you.
All the above could have nothing to do with you or how your ex feels about you, but because that’s the “proof” you’re looking for, that’s what you find and see.
I am not saying everything you see is “imaginary” or that your gut feelings don’t matter, on the contrary. Gut feelings are real and our intuition is messages to us from us. A reminder to pay closer attention to what our “busy” mind and “busy” life is not paying attention to. When we ignore our gut feelings, we do so at our own peril.
But relying on gut feeling alone without examining why the gut feeling is there in the first place is a lazy way of approaching life. Relying on “signs from the universe” for your relationships and attracting back your ex is even worse especially if you have attachment anxiety or tend to be attachment avoidant.
Hyperactivation or hyper vigilance often interferes with true gut feelings. It also opens you up to manipulation from so called spiritualists type. These “artists” know that there are too many gullible men and women looking for the easy way; simple solutions that don’t require tasking your brain matter, no effort doing the hard work relationships require and no personal responsibility — and they tap into that. Telling you exactly what you want to hear and see.
Some men and women when presented with real “signs from their ex” refuse to believe their own eyes and ears. They are like “But the Psychic said…”. This despite the fact that their ex is walking the isle with someone else in two weeks. They’re still holding on to hope based on what the Psychic said. Like the universe is going to suddenly snatch their ex from the other man or woman and deliver them at their doorstep… like in the movies.
Yes, God can restore a relationship with my ex. Yes, the universe does send us signs sometimes. But not everything that happens is a “sign God or the universe” wants you to be with your ex.