While there really is no excuse for infidelity, the growing trend of labeling every man (or woman) who has a sexual libido that is higher than what society has decided is “normal” a sex addict is is troubling. Without even knowing a person’s psychological or medical condition, we conclude that the only reason any man — any man at all — could possibly be able to have sex with 13 women and counting is because he is out of control and powerless to stop the compulsive behavior.
What if Tiger was just being Tiger? Tiger doing what men with a high sex drive have been doing from time unknown and men will be doing it till kingdom come. The only difference is that once upon a time (and still is in many cultures all over the world) men took more than one wife, had multiple relationships with mistresses and a series of one-night-stands with prostitutes.
Obsession? Addiction? Or just high sex drive? And who decides how many times is too many times already? Without talking to the person, how do we even come to the conclusion that the need to have sex is unmanageable or that the person is experiencing tremendous shame, pain and self-loathing? Are we there watching the person having sex to decide they don’t enjoy it but just doing it to temporarily self-medicate in an effort to alleviate stress, emotional or psychological pain?
Have we as a society become so afraid of our sexual urges that anyone who is capable of having sex with 13 women and counting is automatically considered “sick?”
PS: This is not an endorsement of what Tiger Woods did. Hardly. No one is responsible for Tiger’s actions except for Tiger. Tiger messed up when he took those marriage vows and broke them. No doubt he is paying for more than the price for it. This is simply being real with ourselves and the lies about sex we as a society live.
Let me know what you think.