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Telling someone “I don't want anything to do with you too. Have a good life” is to use your words closing things off for good.
This means seeing their behaviour through an attachment lens and responding as if you’re dealing with a dysregulated fearful avoidant ex.
As a secure attachment based coach, I don’t like that they do, but the reality is that sometimes they work, at least temporarily.
If approached this way, your ex will likely admit that they lied to you about seeing someone else and tell you why they...
Your ex’s last experience of you is the version of you they carry, and until something overrides, softens, or replaces...
You might find that she never got over you, is happy that you reached out but also scared at the same time.
Being asked to take responsibility feels like being forced to say they regret the breakup, and they don’t.
You've more control than you realize. This is why I want you to start looking at getting back with an avoidant ex differently..
You can want contact and they don't. You don’t need to keep signalling interest when they’ve already received the message...
They don’t come back because they think that their ex will shame and punish them for breaking up.
