Question: Yangki, I need your help. My ex broke up with me after 5 years together. Her reason was that we are growing apart because I’m not as driven as she is. I earn a good living but I can certainly do better. I just haven’t been motivated to do more. I have talked to friends about it and they all say she’s not worth it. My family and close friends don’t understand why I still want to work things out. We have a lot of fun together and talk on the phone for hours and hours. I believe that she is my soulmate and want her back in my life. My question is: Do you think that we can overcome this and how?
Yangki’s Answer: Unfortunately, contrary to what we are told about relationships when growing up, love is not enough. Someone can love you so much but if as in your case she doesn’t think you are as driven as she is, it doesn’t matter how much she loves you, she won’t want to be with you.
I’m sure your friends and family care about you and mean well but at the end day, this is about your heart, your life.
You are the one who knows what’s like to feel who she is and what she is about. Your friends and family only see what they see but they are not the ones that cry the tears, lay awake at night thinking of her or feel the heartbreak.
In other words, you decide what you want.
If you want her back, you have to show her that you are driven to succeed too. If she still has strong feeling a for you, she’ll hold off getting into a relationship for sometime to give you the opportunity to show her you are motivated. After that, she’ll find someone else she feels is as driven as she is.