Question: My fiancé called it off about a month before the wedding. That was 5 weeks ago, in that time we have only had 1 week without contact. He will not initiate contact but responds to text that don’t require a response and opens up about family and work. We were on the phone Wednesday and I asked him if he sees us getting back together. He said he doesn’t know. So I asked him if he misses us and how we were, he said he didn’t want to talk about it and quickly said goodnight and hang up. I sent a text to ask him why he was in a hurry to hang up. He apologized and said talking was too confusing. Since then he’s pulled away. He still answers my texts but is cold and distant. Is this just a bump or him pulling away for good?
Yangki’s Answer: It could be both. Based on my experience, this kind of reaction from an ex is because you either want to talk about the old relationship (what happened, and why) or are trying to steer the conversation to “getting back together” too early in the process.
Send a text telling him that you might have brought up getting back together too soon and you can understand why he responded the way he did. That you’d like to continue talking but not about the old relationship or getting back together.
Then try to keep conversations on what he is comfortable talking about, family and work (and any other topics that are not about the past or a future together), at least for a few more weeks, or until you see him warming u to you again.
You didn’t say why he called off the wedding. Whatever it is, make sure that you are working on what you can on your part. At the end of the day, nothing will work if the same reasons for the break-up are still in the way.