Question: My ex and I started talking again after 3 months of no contact. I had texted him a couple of times and no reply, so I told him I just wanted us to be friends and he responded. Although he is incredibly nice to me, initiates contact, and we have a good time, I’m worried that he only sees me as a friend. Every time he tells me about a woman he went out with, my heart breaks all over again. Should I tell him I still have feelings for him?
Yangki’s Answer: Yes. He definitely sees you as friend and that’s why he’s comfortable talking to you about the other women he goes out with.
This is why I strongly advice against offering “friendship” when you want more than friendship. By saying you just wanted to be friends, you set your own trap.
There are two things you can do:
1. Continue with the way things are.
The risk with this is that one day he’s going to meet someone he’s really into, and she may say she does not want him talking to you, or;
2. Be honest with him and tell him you still have feelings for him.
Three things will likely happen.
- He may still have feelings for you too, and a new romance will blossom.
- He may tell you friendship is all he can offer you and let you decide what you want to do… stay in contact or severe all contact.
- He may decide that he does not want to give you the wrong idea and that it’s not a good idea to stay in contact anymore.
Either choice comes with a risk, decide carefully.