Can I Get My Ex Back If She’s In Love With The New Guy?

Question: Can I get my ex back if she’s in love with the new guy? She posts photos on Instagram calling him her true love

We broke up over two months ago but a few weeks ago I found out that while we were still together she was seeing the new guy she’s now with. The work together. I confronted her and I’ve never seen her so angry. She said I knew who she was, and that she wasn’t happy and she tried to tell me many times; but I begged her not to leave and she didn’t want to hurt me so she stayed. I told her I didn’t realize how unhappy she was and promised to change but she said she didn’t think I can make her happy.

I must add that when we met she was in a relationship but left him for me. So she basically did the same thing to me that she did to her ex. You’re probably going to tell me, I need to walk away but I love her so much and want her back. I just don’t know how to get her back if she’s already in love with the new guy. Do you even think I should even try to get her back or is this a lost cause? Any advice will be appreciated.

Yangki’s Answer: I read the first part of your question, and my thoughts were, “Yes. You can get your ex back even if she’s in love with the new guy”. Then I read where she said you knew “who she was” and that she only stayed because you begged her. Then you added that bit about how you met, and history repeating itself.

Finding out that your ex is in love with someone else is hard enough. Finding out that she was seeing him while you were together must be devastating. It’s not my place to tell you whether or not to try; that’s up to you.

But like she said, you knew who she was, and you still fell in love with her. I am not saying what she did is okay, I am just saying there red flags right from the beginning. The red flags are there now too.

1)  If she’s calling this new guy her true love, it means that given her history for the next 2 years they’re going to be very happy together. Then maybe she’ll cheat on him, break-up and move on to the next guy. Can you wait 2 years for her to get over the other guy; and maybe move on to you?

2) Do you know if her other ex tried to get her back and if she’s the type to take back an ex. Even if she took you back, chances are that she’ll cheat again. Do you want to take that risk, again?

Like I said, it’s your decision whether or not to try to get her back. I am just laying the facts so that you make the best decision for yourself.

Maya Angelou said, “Remember this because it will happen many times in your life. When people show you who they are the first time believe them.”


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