Question: Yangki, I read your Dating Your Ex eBook and one of the things you said is that it’s the moments when you both encounter something new and surprising about the other that creates momentum and moves things further. My ex and I have a date and I am picking her up from work and going out for dinner. But I was thinking of cooking and serving her a full course dinner at my place. One, she’s not been to my place since the breakup and two, I’m a really good cook but neglected to cook for her while we were together.
I want to create new memories in the way you talk about in your eBook, any tips? Thank you in advance.
The Love Doctor’s Answer: You are some really cool guy. Lucky woman!
This is one tip I’ve shared and have received feedback saying, it did the magic.
Call her up and after the usual chit-chat. Allow a few seconds of silence to pass, then like you’ve been thinking of something really important that has been weighing on your mind, say something along these lines (revise the words, so it’s more you):
“I’m struggling with a decision and need your help. I have two options, A and B. Which do you think I should choose?”
She may ask, what exactly is involved in each option. Just say it’s something you’d rather not talk about just yet. At this point all you need is some kind of external confirmation on which direction you should go. Then say, don’t put too much thought into it.
If you’re not usually the type to make spontaneous decisions, she may get a little uneasy with this new development, but you want to keep the air of mystery. Say something along these lines (revise the words, so it’s more you):
“I know this is so unlike me, but this is one decision I just have to be spontaneous about, that’s why I’m asking for your help”.
Whichever option she picks, A or B, simply say, “Thank you so much. See you Saturday”
Don’t tell her what you’re planning on doing. Saturday, pick her up as arranged but then suggest you make a little detour to your place because you forgot something.
The rest is up to you! Let me know how it turns out.