Question: Yangki, my ex and I have positive text conversations and he is responsive but after three or so exchanges, he just stops. As you say in your ebook, sometimes this is appropriate as the conversation has ended. But it’s not always the case. Any thoughts would be very much appreciated.
Yangki’s Answer: Without knowing more about your relationship or where things are right now, I can only give you a list of reasons why this may be happening.
1. You contact him when he’s busy doing something else. He does not want to be rude or he actually wants to talk to you, so he starts talking but gets distracted after a few exchanges.
2. He doesn’t want long text conversations. Some people are just like that. They’d rather talk on the phone than text.
3. He doesn’t know what to say after three or so exchanges.
4. He’s not emotionally engaged. He responds but is not very interested in whatever the two of you are talking about.
5. He does not want to get emotionally attached to talking to you because if he does, he’ll start missing talking to you.
6. He’s just being polite — and not telling you he’d rather you stop contacting him (See my article: 12 Signs Your Ex Is Being Polite Or Leading You On).
Use the process of elimination to narrow down the list. For example, change the times you call to times you think he’ll be less pre-occupied and more relaxed, end the conversation after three or so exchanges, introduce new topics into your conversations etc.