Text messaging may not be the perfect mode of communication for getting your ex back, but studies show that 90% of people open a text message within three minutes, and exes respond to texts at a significantly higher rate and much quicker than phone calls or emails. It’s not called “instant” messaging for nothing!
But what exes like most about texts messages is that you can also ignore them for hours, days and even weeks.
There are things you can do to ensure that your ex not only responds to your tests messages but responds quickly.
I’m going to give you 5 tested and proven tips that’ll get your ex to respond to texts quickly. It’s important that you try to do all of them to increase your chances of getting of a reply.
Tip # 1 – Ask a simple question
The reason many people text rather than email is that text messaging mimics face-to-face conversation. And just like in face-to-face conversations when you ask a question, the other person is more likely to answer. Ignoring a question just seems rude.
Sometimes all you need to do is ask a question to get a quick response from your ex. It shouldn’t be just any question like “Hey, what’s up?” or “Did you ever love me?
From experience with my clients, updates about friends or family and “insider” topics tend to get a response. But in order to get your ex to respond quickly give it some urgency. Think of it as when you send an email and put “response needed” in the subject line. Your text should have the same urgency. The simpler the question, the more likely you are to get a quick response.
Tip # 2 – Use emotion words
The hardest part about communicating with an ex is to how to get their attention and trigger their curiosity.
If your text message is doing neither, your ex is 1) not going to respond quickly and 2) not going to respond at all.
Using emotion words gets your ex’s attention and triggers more than curiosity. It triggers an emotion or set of emotions. From experience with my clients, emotion words such as amazing, wonderful, interesting, furious, terrible, troubling, unexpected, latest, new etc. in a text tend to grab attention and get a quick response.
Tip # 3 – Text when your ex is more likely to be receptive
The time of the day or day of the week you text, call or ask to see your ex makes a huge difference in terms of whether you’ll get a response or not, and if that response will be positive and warm, or cold and distant.
Early morning texts, calling your ex at work, late night calls, and weekend calls may be something you want to avoid or keep at minimal, at least until things pick up.
Tip # 4– Share something exclusive
In general, topics that engage and challenge our intellect and makes us want to dig deeper to for answers catch our attention and prompt a response or reaction.
Next time you want your ex to respond try sharing a mystery, intrigue, a secret, exclusive news and any information that has clues, a plot, a twist, surprise or puzzle.
If you want your ex to respond quickly add a question that challenges their intellect and triggers an emotion or set of emotions.
Tip # 5– Be interested, warm and friendly
While it’s important to be open about what you’re thinking, feeling, what you want, your fears, and worries etc., focusing too much on yourself is a major turn off for most people.
Be attentive and listen to not just to what your ex is saying, but also to what he/she is not saying. This goes back to approaching communication with your ex as if you were meeting someone new for the first time. Show understanding and appreciation for his/her feelings, viewpoint, state of mind, style of communication etc., and be genuinely interested in what is happening in his/her life, especially the “new” things that have taken place since the break-up.
The more genuinely interested you are, the more likely that your ex will respond quickly.
A word of caution. Most exes are overly sensitive to grand romantic gestures of interest in them. Confessions of undying love or commitment, expensive gifts, relocating, asking your ex to get back together in the very initial stages will make your ex uncomfortable about contact with you, and may scare them off completely.