2 – Stick to a course of action long enough to see change
Most needy and clingy people operate almost solely on emotion alone. Not only do emotions obscure their sound judgment, emotions by their very fluctuating nature make it hard to stick to any particular course of action.
The worst thing you can do to your chances of getting your ex back is be seen as not sure, or don’t know what you are doing to make the relationship work.
To show that you know what you are doing, don’t try to do too much too soon. This is especially important when dealing with an ex who is not very responsive. Small consistent actions get you further than big drastic emotion-driven decisions — like cutting off all contact and two weeks later coming back claiming you want to give the relationship another chance. It doesn’t inspire the kind of trust that communicates confidence in what you are doing.
It is important to keep in mind when setting up your personal improvement and growth goals and actions, the end goal is not to block any and all emotions — you do need your emotions for your heart or gut feeling decisions. The goal is to make sure that your decisions are not influenced by fear, worry, anxiety or attempts to manipulate your ex.