I am happy for you, Nikole… :)I too hope that …

Comment on Contact and How Not to Pressure Your Ex by Love Doctor, Yangki Akiteng.

I am happy for you, Nikole… 🙂

I too hope that things move beyond “friends”… I believe you will.

Love Doctor, Yangki Akiteng Also Commented

Contact and How Not to Pressure Your Ex
If by “let go”, you mean “give up”, I shouldn’t decide that for you. It’s your heart… your life.

If you mean, stop asking her out, then yes. In my experience, this usually happens because things have not built up to take it to the next level.

Try to build more emotional momentum before asking her out again.

Unless of course you think your ex is playing mind games.


Contact and How Not to Pressure Your Ex
Keep the lines of communication open while he figures himself out, but do not try to actively get him back. In other words, keep the door open for possibilities but go about living your life. He may or may not want you back after he’s “unconfused” himself. The open lines of communication helps you keep track of where you stand, so you can decide whether to keep trying or let him go.


Contact and How Not to Pressure Your Ex
In the book I say do not apologize for your role in the break-up when your ex is not ready to hear you. It doesn’t help in that the apology may come across as a desperate attempt to change your ex’s mind. If you already apologized once, don’t do it too many times because then the apology will be meaningless.

In your case, you made a mistake saying never to contact you again, that’s different from apologizing for your role in the break-up. And you are right, you can’t initiate contact and act like you didn’t say “never contact me”. An apology is necessary.


Recent Comments by Love Doctor, Yangki Akiteng

The Break-Up Has Happened… It’s REAL… Now What?
I am humbled… 🙂

Yes, it takes as long as it takes…

The “emotionalizing” is that ‘spilled milk’ thing I talk about in the book. The good thing is that you are focused on forward movement and not just ‘waiting it out” like many people do. You don’t grow sitting put.


Can An Emotionally Aloof Person Change?
Most of the time, it’s something you learn early in life. Cold and self centered kind of becomes your “default” traits. Some people continue it into adulthood because it’s either the only way they know how to or there is some sort of “reward” for them being cold and self centered (why would they want to change?).

Since it’s something that was learned – whatever can be learned can be unlearned. The only exception – at least from what I read – is if something happened to your brain to cause you not to be able to have/experience certain feelings the way the rest of us do, then you need more than just “unlearning” the behaviour. Other than that, if you really want to change, you CAN CHANGE!


The Break-Up Has Happened… It’s REAL… Now What?
Thank you for giving us a peak into your heart and soul… simply beautiful.

You are an inspiration!


How Letting Go Helps Get Back Your Ex
Congratulations, May!… 🙂

You will be just fine… I know it. All the very best.


The Break-Up Has Happened… It’s REAL… Now What?
Thank you for your very kind words, Melissa.

I was hoping (more like anxious) that I would be able to pass on the “sasa” (expectant waiting) concept without losing the reader. Your comment tells me I somehow did what I set out to accomplish.

There is only so much you can put into a relationship before you start getting diminished returns on your investments. Hopefully your ‘new” relationship with your ex or with someone new will be more balanced.


More from Yangki Akiteng

What Not To Do When Your Ex Is With Someone Else

There are three common schools of thought on how grabbing back your...
Read More