Comments on: Why Someone You Love Doesn’t Want You: Pt.2 http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/why-the-man-or-woman-you-love-doesn%e2%80%99t-want-you-pt-2/ Mon, 21 May 2012 23:29:51 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: The Love Doctor http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/why-the-man-or-woman-you-love-doesn%e2%80%99t-want-you-pt-2/#comment-850 The Love Doctor Wed, 20 Jan 2010 20:23:18 +0000 http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/?p=2769#comment-850 “don't give up just yet...” That’s the spirit. Please keep reading this series :) “don’t give up just yet…”

That’s the spirit. Please keep reading this series :)

]]> By: R's Beau http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/why-the-man-or-woman-you-love-doesn%e2%80%99t-want-you-pt-2/#comment-849 R's Beau Wed, 20 Jan 2010 20:12:21 +0000 http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/?p=2769#comment-849 I’m in almost the exact same situation with my ex. I’ve cleaned up my act so much that she says she can hardly recognize me but she still doesn’t want me. At this point it is really her call. I say don't give up just yet if you still love her. I’m in almost the exact same situation with my ex. I’ve cleaned up my act so much that she says she can hardly recognize me but she still doesn’t want me. At this point it is really her call. I say don’t give up just yet if you still love her.

]]> By: The Love Doctor http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/why-the-man-or-woman-you-love-doesn%e2%80%99t-want-you-pt-2/#comment-847 The Love Doctor Wed, 20 Jan 2010 17:17:28 +0000 http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/?p=2769#comment-847 It's frustrating when you are doing all this changing and growing but if it's not working. If part of why you broke up in the first place is because your ex thought you were “self -centered” then it’s only natural that she still sees your efforts in that light. It’ll take a lot of selflessly showing - consistently and over a period of time - that you have genuinely changed for her to believe the changes. This takes time and patience. Anything that feels like putting pressure on her to “see that you’ve changed” is going to backfire. Ultimately, if she’s going to come back to you, it’ll be because SHE WANTS to and not because YOU MADE her do it. It’s frustrating when you are doing all this changing and growing but if it’s not working. If part of why you broke up in the first place is because your ex thought you were “self -centered” then it’s only natural that she still sees your efforts in that light. It’ll take a lot of selflessly showing – consistently and over a period of time – that you have genuinely changed for her to believe the changes.

This takes time and patience. Anything that feels like putting pressure on her to “see that you’ve changed” is going to backfire. Ultimately, if she’s going to come back to you, it’ll be because SHE WANTS to and not because YOU MADE her do it.

]]> By: Wiser Paul http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/why-the-man-or-woman-you-love-doesn%e2%80%99t-want-you-pt-2/#comment-846 Wiser Paul Wed, 20 Jan 2010 12:39:01 +0000 http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/?p=2769#comment-846 My ex says she loves me but she doesn’t want me. I’ve done a lot of changing and growing since our break up, yet she does not appreciate these efforts. She sees them as self-serving manipulation to get her back. It's so frustrating to do all the work to change and grow and not be acknowledged for one's efforts. I need her to see that I’ve really changed and that I love her so much and don’t want to lose her. What more do I need to do? My ex says she loves me but she doesn’t want me. I’ve done a lot of changing and growing since our break up, yet she does not appreciate these efforts. She sees them as self-serving manipulation to get her back. It’s so frustrating to do all the work to change and grow and not be acknowledged for one’s efforts. I need her to see that I’ve really changed and that I love her so much and don’t want to lose her. What more do I need to do?

]]> By: The Love Doctor http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/why-the-man-or-woman-you-love-doesn%e2%80%99t-want-you-pt-2/#comment-816 The Love Doctor Sun, 17 Jan 2010 21:40:57 +0000 http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/?p=2769#comment-816 Thanks Kimmie, but that’s not what I’m saying. Please read <a href="http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/?p=2704" rel="nofollow"><strong>Pt.1 </strong></a>of this series, I explain how what you DO can be a reflection of WHO you are at any particular state of personal development. The BEING yourself vs. DOING yourself comes when you're trying to externally regulate what should be regulated from the inside. When you’ve taken time to get to know and love YOU, there will be no difference between who you are (the inner you) and what you do (your outer actions). E.g. if you’re in touch with who you are as a compassionate being, everything you do is naturally compassionate. It’s just who you are - and what you naturally do. It's all you KNOW how to be and just can't help youself. Similalry, if you’re in touch with who you are as a naturally sexual being, everything you do is naturally sexy. It’s just who you are - and what you naturally do. You are just BEING yourself and not just putting on an act. DOING yourself (which sadly for most people is WHO they are and all they know to to be) is what ruins most relationships. The WHO you really feel you are inside will keep popping up in the act and messing things up for you. I hope this long explanation clarifies the difference between what you’re saying and what I’m saying in this blog. Thanks Kimmie, but that’s not what I’m saying. Please read Pt.1 of this series, I explain how what you DO can be a reflection of WHO you are at any particular state of personal development.

The BEING yourself vs. DOING yourself comes when you’re trying to externally regulate what should be regulated from the inside. When you’ve taken time to get to know and love YOU, there will be no difference between who you are (the inner you) and what you do (your outer actions). E.g. if you’re in touch with who you are as a compassionate being, everything you do is naturally compassionate. It’s just who you are – and what you naturally do. It’s all you KNOW how to be and just can’t help youself. Similalry, if you’re in touch with who you are as a naturally sexual being, everything you do is naturally sexy. It’s just who you are – and what you naturally do. You are just BEING yourself and not just putting on an act.

DOING yourself (which sadly for most people is WHO they are and all they know to to be) is what ruins most relationships. The WHO you really feel you are inside will keep popping up in the act and messing things up for you.

I hope this long explanation clarifies the difference between what you’re saying and what I’m saying in this blog.

]]> By: kimmie http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/why-the-man-or-woman-you-love-doesn%e2%80%99t-want-you-pt-2/#comment-815 kimmie Sun, 17 Jan 2010 19:35:43 +0000 http://torontosnumber1datedoctor.com/blog/?p=2769#comment-815 I really concur with this blog. It's not who you are but what you're doing that can ruin relationships. Thank you for an excellent post, and please do more similar to this in the future. I really concur with this blog. It’s not who you are but what you’re doing that can ruin relationships. Thank you for an excellent post, and please do more similar to this in the future.

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