A client called me in tears. She had sent her ex one of those “I need some time and space to heal and I would appreciate it if you don’t contact me for awhile. Thanks for understanding” texts that “no contact” experts tell you to send your ex. He wrote back “I completely agree. This relationship is so toxic that any kind of contact now or ever will pull us back to what we both don’t want. I’ll work on myself as you continue to work on yourself. We will both attract better people as a result. I wish you all the best in life”.
She desperately tried to explain that she only wanted some time to heal. His response, “I respected your wish when you said not to contact you, now please respect mine and do not contact me again. I am moving on. Thanks for your understanding.”
That’s not what she expected — and definitely NOT what she wanted. Her intentions were good, but things had suddenly gone from bad to worse.
DON’T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE OF DOING NO CONTACT…
Everyday I work with men and women who had the right intentions but made things worse… you’ve probably done a few yourself.
They went to their ex way TOO EARLY asking to get back together. They begged, pleaded, told their ex how much they love him/her and even wrote really long emails and letters of apology. All they managed to do was push their ex even further away.
Some of them went to their ex with what was TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. “I want us to start over” or “I want a new relationship” or even say “I have changed, can we try again?”
Here’s the thing, you have a history together. Your ex knows you, or at least thinks he/she knows the person he/she thinks you are. He/she is still looking at you and a future with you based on the past, and as far as he/she is concerned, the relationship ended for a reason.
You probably don’t want to hear this but your ex is right. Why didn’t you change when you were still together? Why couldn’t you create a better relationship when you were together? Why should your ex believe that all of a sudden you can now be different?
So what do you do?
May be it’s best to back away for a while… give him/her space… not contact him/her for a few weeks… months…
Sounds like a really good idea, right?
In theory, yes. In reality… let’s just say, it’ll be a mistake to do no contact… a BIG MISTAKE!
First of all, your ex doesn’t know you are backing away for a while… giving him/her space. All he/she knows is: You stopped all contact, blocked all access and are acting like he/she never meant anything….doesn’t exists. Your ex is left to fill the empty space you vacated with all sorts of negative thoughts…
You could be playing minds games (which is true). You could be trying to manipulate him/her to miss you (which is also true). You could just be emotionally underdeveloped and can’t handle rejection or not getting what you want when you want (sad but so true!). But may be you don’t care anymore.. May be you moved on. May be you found someone new. And may be. it’s time he/she moved on too!
No Contact is negative force energy at work.
You are moving away from what you want instead of moving towards it.
You are cutting off communication, the life force of any relationship, instead of trying to strengthen it.
You are acting like you fell out of love and don’t care about the relationship, instead o acting like some who still loves their ex and still wants a relationship with him/her
Negative force energy…. negative outcome.
It’s very possible that your ex may miss you and reach out. But those negative thoughts have been planted in your ex’s mind. And you know what negative thoughts do… they don’t go away…. and sometimes they get stronger.
Weeks later you try to contact your ex, and they won’t respond at all. Or may be they respond, but are cold and distant. Occasionally, you may even re-establish contact and just when it seems that you are making progress, your ex pulls away. He/she can’t get past how you ignored him/her, how you acted like a different person… someone who didn’t seem to care… was cold and distant.
And if your ex got used to the idea of you not being around anymore, he/she may not want to change what’s become comfortable. They may still have feelings for you, but hesitate… because it means starting another new normal… and what if you again “cut him/her off” You shown him/her how cold and distant you can be, what’s to stop you doing it again.
This is the damage “no contact” does to the very foundation of a relationship. It takes away that emotional security; that trust that you will always have your ex’s back no matter what.
What”no contact” does instead is create anxiety, distrust, emotional distance and power-play. Things that not only hurt your chances of getting back together, but damage the very foundation of a relationship you are trying to save, and hold on to.
IT’S TIME TO APPLY POSITIVE FORCE!
Reprogram your relationship with loving behaviours. This is what makes Dating Your Ex very different from any book you may have read about getting back your ex.
Everything is straightforward, loving, caring, honest and open right from the start. No mind games, no trickery or manipulation.
- Your ex will know from the start that you accept that the relationship has ended, but you still love and care about him/her.
- You don’t want to be “just friends”, you want him/her back.
- You’re willing to take things slow, and build a better and stronger relationship.
- You have truly and genuinely changed, and things will be different this time around.
This is probably the only book on getting back your ex that focuses on infusing your relationship with loving behaviours that show that the relationship can indeed be different.
It’s a shame that nobody really talks about this because it’s extremely powerful and works in almost any situation.– John Murray from UK.
Remember, you only have limited time to prove you are worth another chance.
You shouldn’t be wasting that time on mind games, power plays, egg-shell walking, and stalling on taking action. Put your limited time and energy into behaviours that show the relationship can be better – and make your ex want to get back together..
Take advantage of the best tried-and-tested steps that showcase the new and improved you in the best possible way – and in the fastest time.
Even if you’ve been married for years, been dating for only a few months, are in a long distance relationship, struggling to make a connection or put back passion (that “in love” feeling) in your relationship, this step by step guide will break through a lot of negativity, rebuild trust, re-awaken feelings of love and transform distance into connection, no matter how hopeless the situation seems at the moment.
You may be asking yourself, why should I believe YOU?
#1: The first really good reason why you can believe me is: I’m living proof that whatever you find in my e-Book works. For many years — because of my fear of commitment — I was the Queen of On-And-Off Again Relationships. I worked on my own issues and managed to turn things around for myself, get back someone I had driven away several times and had given up on me.
So yes, I know how it is to be away from the one that you do not want to be without. But more importantly for you – I also found out that reconnecting with an old love is not just another date. The dynamics are a whole lot different — and I mean like a whole LOT. I don’t want you to make the mistakes I made!
#2: The second really good reason why you can believe me is: This is an e-Book written by a real practicing successful full-time Relationships Coach with astounding success in love reunions.
#3: The third really good reason why you can believe me is: Many men and women who put the knowledge and wisdom in this e-Book into action are back with their ex and realizing their dreams of the relationship they’ve always wanted!
You’re not just working with a theory, you are working with proven strategies, tools and knowledge gathered from years of hard work, one-on-one consultations with real people going through what you are going through, scientific research — and refining what works, how and when.
DATING YOUR EX STRATEGIES ACTUALLY WORK
I receive so MANY comments and emails from readers who say, “I wish I had found your site earlier” or “I wish I had your eBook a week ago.”
Well… you found my website, and now you can get my eBook.
It’ll only be too late if you don’t start now.
Don’t wait for your ex to come to you — your ex could also be waiting for you to make the first move. At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter whether you are the dumped or dumpee, if you want a relationship, you’ve got to make the first move.
It doesn’t matter that you haven’t contacted your ex in a while; it doesn’t matter if you’ve done so many of the things you are not supposed to do to get back you ex; it doesn’t matter if right now your ex thinks the relationship can’t work; it doesn’t even matter if you don’t believe you can actually get back your ex— Dating Your Ex will walk you through all you need to know – and do to get back your ex.
You have no excuse for not at least trying. You can’t again say, “But I don’t know what to to to get my ex back”. Everything you need to get started, and keep making progress until you and your ex are back together is at your fingertips.
ORDER DATING YOUR EX
When you order using a credit card, you’ll get your eBook within minutes. If you order using debit or e-check, there is a 5 – 7 days wait for payment to clear.
DELIVERY: Managed Access. A download link will be sent to your email address as soon as payment is approved. If you don’t get the email with the link within 5 minutes, please contact us using the email address provided at payment.
This is an eBook that you save onto your computer, phone or iPad and read it from there. Do not bookmark or read from our server because our server only holds your purchase for 48 hours. But if you save it to computer or device, you have the eBook for as long as you need it, anytime you want to read it. It’s yours.
Save it as you would any PDF file and use the program (adobe) you use to open PDF files to open and read. If you are unable to open the eBook, please contact us using the email address or telephone number provided with your purchase.
My reputation speaks for itself and I stand 100% behind all my e-books and my money back guarantee. Using the steps outlined in the eBook, I am 100% confident you will see progressive POSITIVE CHANGES in your ex; changes that’ll get your ex back into your life! You have 45 days to apply the steps offered in the eBook and if you don’t see a change in your ex’s behaviour, send us an email via the contact page and we’ll advice you on how to get a refund for HALF the price of the eBook. Please make sure you send us your purchase ID for verification.
STILL FEELING EMOTIONALLY SHAKEN BY THE BREAK-UP?
Many people who do no contact say they do it to get their emotions together. They are rightfully afraid that their emotions will get in the way. But we’ve already seen the almost irreparable damage cutting off contact does to a relationship, even if done with the best of intentions.
That’s why I wrote It’s Just A Break-Up to help you work through your emotions even as you try to get back your ex. Used together with Dating Your Ex, your chances with no doubt DOUBLE. You’ll be in complete control of your emotions, but more importantly, be in a better position to build up that very important EMOTIONAL MOMENTUM you need to get back your ex.
It’s Just A Break-Up can be ORDERED HERE