‘Playing Hard To Get’ Archives
How Much Contact Is Too Much Contact?
Question: She’s 46, I’m 33. We’ve been having really great dates and getting closer slowly. I’m falling for her an she said she was very attracted to me. But I think I may have also started acting a little needy and contacted her too much because on one date she said her ex-husband was too insecure and needy and she’s not looking [...]
How Can I Hold On To My Boyfriend?
Question: Thank you for everything you're doing. This is by far the best advice site and blog on authentic relationships. My story in brief is that for 3 years I have been hiding my true feelings, lying about who I’m with and where I’ve been and generally playing mind games with this one man whom I love very much. I just don’t know how [...]
How To Respond To Your Ex’s “No Contact” Rule
For whatever reason, you were not happy in the relationship and decided to end it. The next thing you know - your ex has completely cut you off. They unfriended you, blocked you, won't respond to your texts and will not pick up the phone. It's like he/she disappeared off the face of the earth. No reason. No explanation. Nothing. Should you fall [...]
Can Reverse Psychology Get Your Ex Back?
Comment: Christine, I think that No Contact works if you wait long enough for both you and your ex to remember the good times at the beginning of your relationship, more easily than you remember the bad times at the end. Like John, I acted very needy and desperate at the end and she threatened to report me to the authorities if I didn't stop [...]
Why We Love Them: Shy Men and Women Are Sexy
Count me in... I also think that confident (I-know-who- I-am type) men and women who are a little shy (not anxiety type shy, but "modest" shy)... and easily get embarrassed are so cool. A September 2011 study published on the online issue of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology has it that time and again, results showed people who [...]
One Thing Your Ex May Be Right About You
Question: I read your posts " Is It Me Or is My Ex Emotionally Unavailable?" and I have a few questions to ask. How do you know it's about you and how do you know you are with an unavailable partner? I was with my ex-boyfriend for 2 years. We were happy for the first 2 months, after that I was unhappy. This is where I made a mistake, I started [...]
Is My Co-Worker Flirting Or Leading Me On?
Question: She’s 36 and I am 31 and we work for the same company. We went out for a couple of dates and both times had a great time. There was a lot of passionate kissing but no sex involved. I asked her if she’d like to go out for a third date and she said she’ll think about it. To cut the long story short, that was three weeks ago. She [...]
How Do I Attract A Good Woman?
Question: I read your article "How To Spot A Good Woman" but have found it hard to find or attract one. That's not because I think that there are no good women out there, but because in my experience good women are hard to find here in Seattle. I've never really been good with women. I'm not terrible at it either. I can go to a club and easily [...]
Does She Love Me or Am I Wasting My Time?
Question: Three months, two dates every week and many expensive gifts but we’ve never been alone, just the two of us. It’s always one high-end party after another. Money is not a problem. I do quite well and take pleasure in making my woman happy. I also like her friends and they like me but it'd be nice to once in a while go out on a normal [...]
Does Acting Aloof Make You More Attractive?
Question: I’ve been involved with a guy for a year and a few months. He’s very physically attractive, charming, witty and shares my interests and values. He's also one of the few people not afraid to point out my mistakes, which I really do value. But the relationship has its problems. I don’t want to call it toxic but there is definitely [...]
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