Friday April 25th 2014

‘Mind Games’ Archives

How To Respond To Your Ex’s “No Contact” Rule

How To Respond To Your Ex’s “No Contact” Rule

You decided to end a relationship that was not meeting your needs, was emotionally suffocating, deeply troubled (too many arguments and fights) or simply moving too fast in terms of the level of closeness or commitment you are comfortable with, and the next thing you know - your ex has completely cut you off. They unfriended you, blocked you, [...]

Don’t Ignore Relationship Doubts, Experts Warn

Don’t Ignore Relationship Doubts, Experts Warn

"If you are having doubts about the relationship, just ignoring them may make a difference years down the road," said Matthew Johnson, assistant professor in the U of A Department of Human Ecology. The study, published Novermber 2, 2012 in the journal Family Process, showed that couples who were more confident as they exchanged vows also spent [...]

Who Should Initiate Contact – Dumper Or Dumpee?

Who Should Initiate Contact – Dumper Or Dumpee?

Shouldn't the dumper be the one to initiate reconciliation? I get asked this question quite a lot, and thought a longer response might help clarify a few things. Although I've often used the words "dumper" and "dumpee" myself, I'm convinced that "dumper" and "dumpee" labels oversimplify the break-up and reconciliation process. "Dumper" [...]

How Do I Attract A Good Woman?

How Do I Attract A Good Woman?

Question: I read your article "How To Spot A Good Woman" but have found it hard to find or attract one. That's not because I think that there are no good women out there, but because in my experience good women are hard to find here in Seattle. I've never really been good with women. I'm not terrible at it either. I can go to a club and easily [...]

What Does Your Ex Think Of Your Intentions?

What Does Your Ex Think Of Your Intentions?

If you've been reading my blog and have my eBooks, by now you know I'm all for keeping contact with your ex, if you want him or her back. You cut off contact you cut the connection. Trying to recover that connection later on will be much harder than you can imagine. But just mere contact for the sake of contact isn't enough to keep the [...]

How Self-Trust Can Get Your Ex Back – Pt. 2

How Self-Trust Can Get Your Ex Back – Pt. 2

Continued from Pt. 1... If you find yourself over-analyzing your ex's every word or action, to the point that you are afraid to say anything or take action, or think its best to avoid your ex because you'll mess things up -- you have a serious problem with self-trust. Self trust -- the ability to take action based on your belief in yourself [...]

Why She Left You For Another Guy [Pt. 4]

Why She Left You For Another Guy [Pt. 4]

Continued from Pt. 3. Boredom can kill a relationship faster than you can say “Honey, what's wrong?" It doesn't matter that you think the person shouldn't be bored, if she (or he) is bored, there'll be no "happiness" for you either. A bored partner, if you're open minded, not only puts your stagnation into its proper perspective, they also [...]

How To Stop The Silent Treatment

How To Stop The Silent Treatment

Question: We got in a heated argument but after realizing that it was about nothing important, I apologized.  We had sex afterwards. Next morning, I woke up and found him already up and about to leave for work. I said good morning but no response. I asked him what was wrong and he said he had an important meeting that morning. At lunch time, I [...]

5 Tips On Breaking Up Amicably

5 Tips On Breaking Up Amicably

Amicable break-ups where there are no lingering resentments are rare, but they do happen. Here are some quick tips on how to have one. 1. Plan time to have the break-up talk. If possible, do it over a period of time to allow both of you to process your feelings, ask all the questions you may have, and say your goodbyes. 2. Be open and [...]

Don’t React Too Fast – Or Take Too Long To Respond

Don’t React Too Fast – Or Take Too Long To Respond

According to a recent study published in Applied Mathematics and Computation, a certain time range is necessary for compound emotions to form. Reacting too quickly or taking too long to respond can both lead to trouble. Building on a relationship reactivity model first described by Steven Strogatz in 1988, Natalia Bielczyk looked at a more [...]

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