Monday July 28th 2014

‘Healthy Attachment’ Archives

Help! My Ex Wants Me Back But I’m Scared

Help! My Ex Wants Me Back But I’m Scared

Question: My ex did not care about my feelings when we were together. He treated me like I was not going anywhere, and he could do whatever he likes. Now that we’re not together he’s being so unbelievably sweet and caring. He has admitted that he was wrong in the way he treated me in the relationship and apologized for being such "a fool". He [...]

Why Do Men Emotionally Pull Away?

Why Do Men Emotionally Pull Away?

Question: Yangki, my situation is similar to Jillian's. My ex also initiates contact but avoids emotionally difficult conversations. It hurts that he shuts me out of his life. He was never one for emotional conversations. Whenever I tried to talk to him about things that were important to me, he’d say he is going through a lot at work and [...]

It’s NOT Needy and Clingy If…

It’s NOT Needy and Clingy If…

Not many of us know we are needy and clingy, let alone can accept that we are. If anyone even remotely suggests that we are that way, we get defensive and accuse the other person of wrongly profiling us. If your desire to get closer only makes the other person want distance, chances are you are needy and clingy. You may not be needy all the [...]

The Niceness Gene – It’s In Your DNA Study Says

The Niceness Gene – It’s In Your DNA Study Says

The next time someone complains that you are "nice", tilt your head sideways, and with raised eyebrows and a slight shoulder shrug tell them, "It's in my genes. I happen to have The Kindness and Generosity Gene!" The reason some people are kind and generous is because they are born kind, according to a study "The Neurogenics of Niceness," [...]

Does Someone Using “No Contact” Love You?

Does Someone Using “No Contact” Love You?

Anna Wrote: I am a little confused about one part in your article. In one of the paragraphs you say that people who use 'no contact' are not using it because they love you... Yet in the same paragraph you also say that these people are not out to hurt the person they love, which implies that this would be done to a person they love... So then, if [...]

3 Key Behaviours That Earn Your Ex’s Trust – Pt. 2

3 Key Behaviours That Earn Your Ex’s Trust – Pt. 2

Continued from - Pt. 1 2. Personal Responsibility It's a human tendency to want to explain, defend oneself and set the record straight. We somehow believe that by "clarifying" things, we can get the other person to see things our way, understand why we did what we did, and hopefully want to give the relationship another chance. In a [...]

How Soon Is Too Soon To Say “I Love You!”

How Soon Is Too Soon To Say “I Love You!”

The exchange of the words "I love you" mark a big milestones in any relationship.  But both men and women sometimes find it difficult to say "I love you" because they are afraid of what the other might say. A client told me he had tried many times to say the words but somehow could not bring himself to say them. When he finally said "I love [...]

10 Types Of People No One Wants To Have Sex With

10 Types Of People No One Wants To Have Sex With

To find or have a partner with whom we can have a real healthy connection with, emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, socially and sexually is an incredible gift, in my opinion. To be that partner is however, a challenge for many of us. Most of us still do not know how to celebrate and honour all these parts of the Self, especially our [...]

Signs You Or Your Partner Is Emotionally Immature

Signs You Or Your Partner Is Emotionally Immature

Emotional maturity is not something most of us consciously look for in a partner. For many of us, it’s not even a priority in the qualities we look for. We kind of take it for granted that if you’re attracted to someone, then everything will fall into place. If the relationship is casual and not expected to grow into something long term, [...]

Why Experts Are Wrong About Giving Your Ex Space

Why Experts Are Wrong About Giving Your Ex Space

Question: Yangki, I've read many of your articles and you seem to advocate not giving your ex space. Why is that? Almost all experts say giving someone space is healthy for all relationships. I just wonder what you base your advice on? The Love Doctor's Answer: If you read my articles more carefully, you will actually see that I'm all for [...]

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