Can I Get Back My Ex a Year After The Break-Up?

Yes, you can get back your ex even a year after the break-up.

If the relationship ended on good terms or if you drifted apart because you were in different places in your lives e.g. (one person was more committed to the relationship than the other, or one person was still trying to figure out his/her life or career and the other was in a more stable place, or the timing just wasn’t right), things can move pretty first because there are no hard feelings or left-over “baggage”.

One year later you may find that both of you are mentally and emotionally prepared, and both committed to making sure the relationship works this time around.

But if things didn’t end too well or if more damage was done post-break-up (e.g. you said mean and hurtful things to the other and haven’t spoken since, or you tried to get back together and quickly realized it was a bad idea), it may take a little more work and time to move past the past, and start over.

In my experience, couples who meet up again one year after the break-up do so because they both are open to giving the relationship another chance. In other words, it’s not so much the amount of time that has passed that makes them want to try a relationship again, it’s the strength of their feelings for each other.

If you had a very strong connection or were really good friends, those things don’t die with time. And if you remained in each other’s lives, the connection and friendship sometimes gets even stronger because when you took out the “expectations” and “pressure” that comes with being a relationship what is left is pure unadulterated love, friendship and companionship.

That’s why if a year later, you are still chasing your ex and he/she is giving you the cold shoulder, or acting hot and cold, you might want to step back and re-think what you are doing. If his/her feelings for you aren’t growing stronger with time, they may never… grow stronger.

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4 Comments

  • Yangki I recently reconnected with my ex of 3 years. 2 months ago I required emergency surgery and texted him that I loved him and miss him after 1.5 years of NC. He didnt respond about my feelings, but responded warm telling me to be strong going into my surgery. Since I texted him a few times, but he grew colder and colder. He gives me the feeling he just doesnt want to talk to me, but he will always reply me. How do I turn this around?

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    • 1.5 years of NC IS A VERY long time to be away, it’s most likely that he moved on, but since you reached out to him when you had emergency surgery he may be trying not to come across as rude or insensitive.

      Also reaching out to someone when you just had surgery and telling him you miss him and love him (after 1.5 years of NC) is suspicious, and can be seen as manipulative (using your condition to get attention or more).

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    • After we broke up I moved away, but after my surgery I moved back home for recovery, and to reconnect with him. But he resists my attempts to talk, except once I asked him about work, he said he was unhappy that career wise, things are the same as 1.5yr ago. He doesn’t like confiding to others about his feeling of lack of achievement. I was happy he felt safe enough to share that with me, but I was unsure how to respond, so I changed the subject to his other hobbies, and he shut down again. Now no matter what I say, he replies just enough to be polite.

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      • This is an example of why I do not advice or encourage NC. After being apart for so long it’s very hard (to impossible) to get back that connection. It’s a lot of trying this and trying that because you are practically strangers and don’t know what to emotionally connect on anymore.

        See if you can use some of the advice here to try to re-establish a connection. It’s going to be very hard though. Also may be other sites that advice NC may have some good advice on how to go about reconnecting in your situation.

        Sorry, I am not of much help when it comes to NC situations.

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